My Mission: New PJs for Gabe, because his old ones are all at least one size too small and look quite foolish.
My accomplices: Gabe, Quin and Ribh (because shopping with no children or even one child is for sissies.)
My Method: Three children in a grocery cart (a "buggy" to southerners). Ribh sits in the child seat. Quin in the basket (despite stern warnings on cart NOT to do so) and Gabe hanging off the side (despite stern warnings on the cart NOT to do so). I should note that no child is restrained by a "belt". But we'll get into that later. My preferred method involves rapid choosing of clothing and frequent distracting of children before bolting with cheap merchandise.
And now, without further ado, The Debacle:
Strange Woman: Oh! Oh! Your baby! Is standing! He could fall!
Me: (Standing two feet from cart, trying in a sweater over my clothing) Ummm? Oh yeah. Thanks. (Thinking to self: Whatever!)
Strange Woman: Oh! The Baby! The Baby! He could fall!
Me: Thank you! SHE'S fine. Got it! (Removing sweater quickly.)
Strange Woman: But the BABY! Could fall! I've seen a baby fall before! (Not moving any closer to us, but wringing her hands and so on)
Me: Yes. I understand. It's okay. I'm almost done.
Strange Woman: I've seen a baby fall before and HAVE TO GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM!
Me: Yes. SHE'S FINE FOR A MINUTE! (Beginning to be quite annoyed ON PRINCIPLE. Sheesh woman! I have three children. I know what I am doing. Leave me alone!)
Strange Woman: Why don't you have her buckled up? She could fall! And have to go to the Emergency Room!
Me: She just wiggles out of the belt. I'm almost done here. (My other children begin climbing my body while asking questions about what the Emergency Room is and who the weird lady is)
Strange Woman: I saw a child fall and have to go to the EMERGENCY ROOM!
Me: I appreciate your help. We are leaving now!
Strange Woman: That's illegal! (Grumbling and grousing unintelligibly)
Me: Huh? (Get me the Heck outta here!)
I rush to the checkout and quickly purchase my single pair of pajamas. As I replace my check card in my wallet, Ribh leans over to grab the credit card swipey thing while her brother moves the cart away from the counter and.....WHOOOMP! Down she goes!
Everyone near the checkout freezes in HORROR! I grab Ribh, quickly assess the damage (she is scared but not hurt) and try to make a run for it, but......that voice! Here comes the Harbringer Harpy of Horror again.
Strange Woman: I TOLD YOU SHE WOULD FALL!!!! NOW YOU NEED TO GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM!
Me: SHE IS FINE! WE ARE NOT GOING TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM! WE ARE LEAVING NOW!
Strange Woman: (To everyone in the area) I told her to buckle that baby up! That kind of behavior is illegal! She shouldn't be allowed to......
Me: (Running out the door) Dammit! I KNOW she MADE that happen with all her freakin' insistence that the baby would fall. Ribh stands in the cart (buggy) every freakin' day and nothing happens and then this freak comes along and.....! Arrrrgghhhhhhhh!
Another, Nice Woman, In the Parking Lot: Is your baby okay? Oh, Good! That lady was totally crazy! What did she think was illegal? She's nuts!
Me: Sigh. Thank You! I really needed that validation!
So, to sum up: Ribh is totally fine. She fell on her butt mostly (well padded) but we checked her and cleared out any subluxations in her spine when we got home. NO need for a trip to the ER.
Furthermore, I still defend my position as the parent of my own children to know that A) Ribh does not stay seated and secure in the crappy little belts that are meant to secure very small and immobile children in the seats in shopping carts and that in order for me to shop I must occasionally allow her to stand and wiggle around a bit while I stand nearby and do my thing. B) Just because I have small children does not mean I need to stay home in a freakin' padded cell lest my child should bonk themselves somehow in public. C) That woman pretty much MADE the event occur by her insistence that it WOULD occur plus her ability to totally distract me past my ability to listen to my own instincts. D) NO trip to the ER was ever indicated even if I was some doctor-running freak. (Which I'm not.) E) SHE should be illegal. Damn! That really pissed me off!
5 comments:
Wow Mar! Have you cooled off yet? It amazes me sometimes the way stangers think they have some sort of authority as to what to tell people what to do and what is "right."
I hope the Atlanta area has another Old Navy to check out!
;)
what a story. man, that woman would have sent me over the edge. and I am a firm believer that what you always talk about/ dwell upon/ obsess over has more of a likelihood of occuring just by doing so. just like the concept of prayer: opposite in nature to what that crazy woman did - positive - but the same principle.
anyway... it must have been nice to get that validation in the parking lot. I sure as heck would have needed it... even though, like you, I would have known I did nothing wrong and it was that pain-in-the-butt freak who was the problem.
crazy lady!
Sounds like someone needs a drinky-drink.
Not to diminish your level of indignation, Mar, but perhaps that freakish lady's actions were simply motivated by a genuine concern for your children's well-being. Maybe she feels guilty about not being able to help or prevent the previous, more serious "buggy accident" she witnessed. Just a thought.
On a different note, I'm guessing that the woman in question also leaves her pillow tags intact, since the labels clearly read "not to be removed under penalty of law". That would be illegal.
Just to clear things up: I am aware that her intentions were probably good/benign. I have had people express concern (more appropriately) over my un-secured children in "buggies" at other times and places, so this in itself didn't cause my indignation.
The problem came when she just COULDN'T take my response of "I know. I'm aware of my children's behavior/'precarious position'" as an answer.
I take umbrage at her inability to leave me alone when I indicated that I had recieved her imput but that I did not agree. It was my awareness of her "good intentions" that kept me from freaking out on her and being rude and instead simply trying to leave ASAP. But then she started throwing around the word "illegal" and what not. Jeesh!
As Kris said, imagine what she would think if she knew I sleep with my baby! Nurse past a year! Birthed all my children at home! Adjust their wee necks! etc etc.
I just get jazzed when people insist that their well meaning "concerns" supercede your parental roles and responsibilies and then try to shame one into complying. Especially when they are a complete stranger.
So. I get it. She meant well. She still needed to shut the hell up and go away.
Rock on.
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